Мария Ефименко

It is weird, but I felt a strong urge inside to write a post in English. While I also want this post to be educational, let's play a game. I have been trying to learn some new words and phrases from my Economist magazines. This is a great chance for me to use them in practice and for you to learn them too. The game is quite simple: try to guess which words and/or phrases I use in this post to practice and write them down in a comment. The one who guesses all five of them first will get a small present from me :)

In my blog I have promised to share some tips with you which will help you to learn a foreign language. Finding a pen friend is a must to do so.

Sometimes we tend to underestimate our writing skills. We watch movies in English, read a bunch of articles, listen to radio and podcasts on a regular basis, speak quite well on different topics and overall feel more than confident that our level of English is high. However, writing is a staple of skills and much more trickier and different from others. On the other hand, if you are not satisfied with your level of language, master your writing skills and finding a pen friend are even more important. Moreover, I believe if we ignore improving our writing skills, real success will elude us.

First of all, when you write, you can notice your weak spots. For instance, I am still confused spelling some tricky words from time to time, let alone remembering special phrases. While writing, we have time to check if it is correct and probably we will not make same mistakes in the future.

Second of all, structuring is another great skill you master while writing. When you speak, you basically say what comes to mind first unlike in writing where you have time to think and put all your ideas together.

Thirdly, you can deliberately put new words into practice when you write (like I do in this post playing a game with you). Don't wait for a situation to pop up where you can use the words. It might never come.

Where can I find a pen friend?

Back in 2008 that was a much bigger problem than now. Facebook was hardly popular in Russia back then, so I used MySpace to find people (wow! MySpace still exists!). I kept writing to a bunch of random English-speaking people, usually the ones who were living in the United States and Singapore (the latter cause I was lucky to visit this country once and fell in love). My agenda was some kind of "let's be pen friends, I learn English and am dying to find people I can write to" in a kind and polite manner. I remember when I got a rude response from one American cheerleader saying "F**k off!" and how it upset me 😄 Anyway, I met a few friends this way!

What will we talk about?

Literally everything! Whatever you wish. In addition, for writing purposes it is better to switch from social media to emails, because emails are usually well structured and thought of unlike messages. It would be great if your friend was not from the circle of your acquaintances, so you can share a lot. I had had the best pen friend on Facebook for 5-7 years before he disappeared from social media. To be honest, I didn't even know who he was for real (he introduced himself as a young handsome budding entrepreneur from Singapore). Despite that, I could share with him literally everything (don't think I am so dumb, only feelings and some events, not my whereabouts and bank accounts!). Writing to him was like having a personal diary 😄 He replied with long messages discussing all sorts of things! He was truly amazing! Do your best to find such a friend who not only reads your emails and replies shortly, but engenders debates, makes you think, argue and discuss crazy topics you haven't even had in mind!

How often should I write?

I am all for "as frequently as you can" approach. However, usually there are not a lot of stuff going on in a day and you actually need time to write a big email and focus. You don't want your emails to be shoddy, do you? Therefore, once a week is very much preferably. Make a habit in your routine: write an email every week to your friend sharing all the details of that week! I am sure you will not regret that!

Don't be shy, be proactive and I am sure you will find your perfect pen soulmate!